The Grass is Not Greener

I am always amazed by situations. When dealing with couples, families, individuals, business’s, and crisis support, what really is the source of all or may I suggest most problems is that there is something else other than this.  That there has to be a better partner than this, or relationship, or making the wrong the decision.  Yet we are given what we are given in the moment.  The only person to change it, is the person creating the problem.  Let me make a suggestion, the grass is not greener over there, it never will be, why? Because well lets say you are in a relationship and/ or about to make a job decision. Sooner or later you will come to a point where someone at the table offers you a chance to maybe leave your relationship for them, through flirting or games, same can happen in a job.  So lets say you get in your head and think about the option.  What would you do? Most people it seems would really think hard about the option.  Neglecting that what they already have is the option.  In a society addicted to love, romance, sex, power, greed, it never fails to blow my heart when a couple splits because the other believes there is something else, then two weeks later all the things they left their partner for, amazingly show up again, so maybe it wasn’t the partner, maybe it was the “The grass is always greener”.

I had a client offered amazing job, his whole life would change if he took it, better pay, but they would have to move their kids.  Well my client discussed it and said that looking back on the decision he was driven by pride, and money. He up and took his family across the country and within two months the company that had offered him pomp and circumstance, went under.

Another client lost his relationship. He had a friend he had known for years and they occasionally flirted. My client had just found the right person at the time and didn’t realize that he was nervous about this being the one.  So he said, “One night he and his old friend met up and they did a little flirting and the next thing they were meeting up two nights later with out telling his partner. ”  The next thing he was leaving his partner  for his friend, and now he was excited again. He said, ” him and his friend moved quick, it lasted for one month, then something told him he was wrong, and realized why him and his friend where just friends, they split up.  He didn’t realize how much he was addicted to the excitement more than the relationship. He said relationships scared him because he had to be himself and didn’t know how to that.  After realizing this he tried to get back with his old partner.  She didn’t return his calls for months, she wanted to be respected and valued. He realized he thought the grass was greener. Well they got back together and he got comfortable being himself, they have been married happily for ten years now.

The grass is not greener, most of us are addicted to the excitement of the beginning more then we are excited to share our life with someone.   Or build a business with trust worthy people, or enjoy the makings of a great career. We are not patient but patience is a long term thing.  So if right now you are thinking there is something better, or greener over there is, probably not, the diamond right where you are. Relationships are ebb and flow, different from drama created relationships. So enjoy what you have and stop searching.

Thanks for the question from Pakistan.

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The Great Escape

As we continue to speak on the topic of unconditional presence, we come across the great escape.  The escape that each of us makes throughout the day, the escape that has us trying to leave the presence and go to an imaginary land filled with fantasy.  In order to understand the escape we must look at the mind of the being.  As we are beings, the only thing we have control over is now.  So when you manage right now and where your attention is then life becomes simple.  You begin to deal with the actual not the fantasy.  The fantasy is the escape.  Can you see that you are escaping? All you have to do is see the escape in the moment and you will be present.  For example, you begin to feel lonely at your place, and as you feel the lonely feelings, stories begin to happen, as the stories begin to unfold  within you, the loneliness now becomes unbearable, so you find your self escaping to food, drink, drama, chaos, but my question is, can you notice the escape?  If you can notice the escape as it is happening then you will be put back into where you actually are. When this happens you feel the loneliness, and as you feel it, you notice under the feeling is a sense of freedom.  The freedom you have longed for, for many years.

Life is being, and being is life.  In order to have peace in your life, you must acknowledge that you are not peaceful, that you have division, conflict within yourself.  By acknowledging this, you will begin to be with it. By being with it, life will transform.  But you have to be willing to look at it. Have you ever been in a room and your leg starts shaking, and so you become aware of the leg and it stops. Same idea here.  You must become aware that you don’t like being present, it scares you, it frightens you, it makes you not comfortable, so acknowledge that, just allow awareness on it.

Many groups, teachers, have 80 different techniques to free you. When actually you are free, you  just have to be aware of the parts which are conditioned. The mind is conditioned, by religion, society, media, school, family, traditions, rituals, and everything else, but none of it is who you really are.  You can not discover freedom inside the world, freedom is found outside.

So I invited you today to discover and acknowledge the escape.

When you can apply this simple way of being then blame, complain, shame, guilt, criticism, go out the door of yourself and the other.  We must end the division and conflict within. Conflict and division is war.  End the war inside by recognizing it.

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Feeling Lost?

Most people feel lost in some way, whether that is in their career, relationships, money, health, somewhere or some part of their life they feel a sense of disconnection from the whole. That is expressed with, “I feel lost”, “I don’t know who I am”, or subtle forms, “Its my partners fault”, “My boss has it in for me,” or “Every relationship that I have been in turns out this way.”  This sense of feeling lost can only found in  one place, your thoughts.  You simply are never disconnected from the whole.  But you have to discover it for yourself. This is the part of life where no body is going to hold your hand and say it is going to be easy. This discovery is the same one Buddha, Jesus, and the mystic’s of our time have each made.  

Our society, educational systems, and corporations are built on the idea of problem solving.  We teach our young people to create problems, and solve them, so when things are going well in someone’s life they will find a problem and solve it.  People are not very comfortable with going with things, but they are very comfortable with creating problems, drama, and chaos.  And yet all we hear is love is all there is, or be still and know. Wonderful ideas that have been passed down from tribe to tribe, but not so comforting when you feel lost.  

This sense of being lost is found in the mind.  The mid is subtle in the way it pulls you in to a story and sometimes a very loud story about you and the other. But most of time the thoughts are feeding you ideas, concept, and beliefs you already know.  So how does one get past being lost. Here is a little hint.  You. You are the key to the whole darn thing. Not your partner, relationships, money, health, food, etc…sure all these things outside of you are showing you what you believe but none of them are going to change till you decided to look at yourself.  Why should anything change for you outside in order for you to be happy?   Once you see what you are looking at with new eyes, then what you see changes.

But how can you see it when you are clouded with thoughts? Awareness is a key component.  I will talk about awareness in my next blog.  

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I have issues…with you?

We seem to live in a society where everyone is looking out.  It reminds me of someone who is looking in a mirror and wanting the mirror to change. The mirror just won’t change itself. In my energy work and working with individuals; what I have discovered is that the first session is about what everyone else is doing to the client. It would be wonderful to hear a client once say, “This is my experience and I take full responsibility for it. I know there are infinite ways to look at this and I am scared to see them. Because I am scared of change, to grow up, to be king or queen.”  

  As we look outside of ourselves we live in lack, limitation, want, need, and expectation.  All of us know in our hearts this doesn’t feel right, so we decided to look at our choices and take responsibility for them.  As an energy worker I only see who you really are without the story, attachment, judgment, and yet when facilitating the work I see all that is around the person and all they have failed to tell me about.  Which is probably for the best.  For me all issues start with our lack of understanding of source, God, energy, whatever you choose to call it, the Mighty I AM presence.

When things happen outside of our selves we try to fix them. Let me give you an example: 2 plus 2 is 4, lets say you think 2 plus 2 is 5.  So you look at the 5 and it doesn’t make sense. The 5 is the effect of the foundational principle of math. 5 is not the answer.  So you try to fix the five and you can’t. You get discouraged and give up. When you give up the fight , you receive and insight, “Oh maybe I need to look at the foundation.” So you look and 2 plus 2 equals 4, simple.  Most everyone when looking at life is conditioned to look at the problem, situation, the end result, and fail to look at the cause.  What is the cause? What caused this result? Not what is the effect? 

When things seem to go wrong in our life, we look at the apparent wrong and act like we aren’t connected to it.  We fail to look at the cause.  The cause is God.  So what is God? Simply God is all and all. Everywhere present and occupying all space. It is not conditional.  In order to know God you have to understand God and take action from that place.  All Jesus ever did was prove the universal principle that love is all there is. Over and over again he healed others with love. He knew there was only “heaven at hand”. He lived his life this way. He didn’t judge others and condemn them.  He always went to the source of unconditional love which was God. He meditated on the truth, that god had no idea or ideas about sickness, death, or mistakes.  Because God is the creator of our life.  But we were given will. 

When you use that will for love and realize that love gives love and the effect is love coming back, then you are connected to your source. If you keep receiving fear then go to your source and ask for understanding. You can’t even imagine unconditional love. But everything and everyone is helping you. They are helping you open up to the bigger YOU. Whether you like it or not.  And yet we resist and create problems. We say, “Oh its my parents, relationships, money, health, this or that.” What I hear is the lack of understanding of who you are really.  Since God is all there is, then you are the mirror of that expression. To know God you have to express love to know love, you have to express kindness to know kindness, compassion to know compassion, that is action. God is action, God is all, and God is free and so are you. That is the truth about everyone. As you understand God, you understand yourself and who you are.  In God there is no problems, situations, drama, chaos, or anything because God didn’t create them. God is love. That is it. And it keeps expanding itself. It is the same today, tomorrow, and yesterday. 

So when we have issues then you IS-YOUS. Recognize you have created an amazing experience.  You have chosen to look to God.  Remember nothing is hidden from you. God built you and made you in its image and likeness.  You are loved and so you are loveable.  My hope is that today you go to God and ask for wisdom and understanding in your life.  You will be provided for and taken care of.  You are golden.  There is nothing and nobody divorced from truth. 

We have all made mistakes, missteps, or hurt others or ourselves by hurting others. But what I have learned from all this is simply this, truth is simple.  Life is simple.  Let go of the fight and experience insight.  Stop fighting your life and creating strife. Go to God and ask and you will receive all you need now. But you have to ask.

Run Forest Run

There is nothing new that be explained about the universe, which deep down inside can not be withheld from itself.  There is nothing to be added, there is nothing to be taken away, there is no such thing as competition, comparing, the other, separation, shadows, all the rest it, but all them when met will allow their falseness to disappear.

So for years this false identity has spoken up, “Excuse ME?”  And it rest here and ends here.  Call it what you will, in fact call it will. But what it is called doesn’t matter, if you decide to call it EGO, smallness, little self, etc…give it a fancy name, catchy phrases, Easing God Out…then the real study begins.  Time to meet it and see what it is. What is this “me”, “you”, “I”?  Find out. And it is in the finding that there was nothing ever there. But first you must meet it.

The story of Forest Gump is a story of the simple. The character loses Jenny. A girl he was in love with, chooses to not stick around.  He is confused so he starts to run. Well for the next year or so he runs all over the country and back again. It is in the Grand Canyon we find him running with a group following him. All them running.  Then Forest stops and says, “I am tired, I think I am going to go home now.” The group is lost, confused, and asks, “Now what are we going to do?” That is life. This practice is not about running. It is quite the opposite.  Being with it all fully. When the call comes, your friends, family will begin to exit the stage.

Most people are very good runners in life. When they find me, they are ready to stop, they have had enough, and just want be with it all. That is challenging.  I used to be a good runner, now I am a good listener. The listening is all that is done. Speaking is just wind coming through the mouth, sometimes what comes out is hot air, sometimes cold, and sometimes the mouth stays shut, because it helps everyone. Right?

Most of us have been running for so long, that we simple forgot why we are running.

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